Kushiel's Dart (Jacqueline Carey)
A big fantasy novel about a courtesan who's tossed into a high-stakes world of political intrigue in late medieval fantasy Europe. For the first 300 pages or so this was really hard to put down; Carey's great at world-building and weaving exposition, and the world she's made is pretty interesting. Unfortunately the book eventually slows down and starts dragging, hamstrung by two issues, one big and one small. The big one is that it's simply too, well, big - the paperback comes in at a hair over 900 pages, and it's not hard to suggest some useless parts that could be cut (my recommendation would be the entire Master of the Straits storyline, which not only adds almost nothing to the story, but feels very out of place having a super-powerful wizard in a very low-magic setting). The second issue is that the characters are not always fleshed out as much as one would hope; our heroine and the main cast mostly come off pretty well, but the head antagonist is barely more than a sketch.
All in all, I guess this is a good beach book, but it's hard to really recommend seeking it out unless you pass it on the shelf at the library.
Grade: B
Showing posts with label not for kids. Show all posts
Showing posts with label not for kids. Show all posts
Friday, March 20, 2015
Monday, May 5, 2014
"A Book of Jean's Own!"
The Onion Presents A Book of Jean's Own!: All New Wit, Wisdom, and Wackiness from The Onion's Beloved Humor Columnist (Jean Teasdale)
This is a book pretend-written by the Onion's intentionally bad humor columnist Jean Teasdale, and it's pretty easy to figure out if it's for you: Just take a gander at her columns (and her website!) and see if you're amused. The book is basically Jean in concentrated form, and I liked it enough to polish it off in one sitting. My only suggestions would be to flip past the recipes (the joke appears to be the insane amount of butter that goes in), and don't listen to Jean's advice that you can skip around the book; there is a narrative thread running through the fake cat journals and Rick's lists of things that annoy the shit out of him that does come to a head at the end.
All in all I liked this book pretty well, and was surprised to see that the Amazon reviews are fairly mixed. I'm tempted to put this down to price; if I'd plunked down the MSRP of $18.99 I don't know that I'd be too pleased, but at $2.31 (with free shipping!) I'm pretty happy.
Grade: B
This is a book pretend-written by the Onion's intentionally bad humor columnist Jean Teasdale, and it's pretty easy to figure out if it's for you: Just take a gander at her columns (and her website!) and see if you're amused. The book is basically Jean in concentrated form, and I liked it enough to polish it off in one sitting. My only suggestions would be to flip past the recipes (the joke appears to be the insane amount of butter that goes in), and don't listen to Jean's advice that you can skip around the book; there is a narrative thread running through the fake cat journals and Rick's lists of things that annoy the shit out of him that does come to a head at the end.
All in all I liked this book pretty well, and was surprised to see that the Amazon reviews are fairly mixed. I'm tempted to put this down to price; if I'd plunked down the MSRP of $18.99 I don't know that I'd be too pleased, but at $2.31 (with free shipping!) I'm pretty happy.
Grade: B
Tuesday, November 5, 2013
"Tampa"
Tampa (Alissa Nutting)
I have to give this book a lot of credit; it's the most gross, inappropriate, squicky, skin-crawling novel I've ever read, starting with the unpleasant furry black dust jacket.
The main character, Celeste (I almost absentmindedly typed "our heroine"; never has that been more inappropriate) is the book's strongest element, a genuinely scary psychopathic predator with a taste for young teenage boys who sums herself up in one sentence on page 41: ""Why did anyone pretend human relationships had value?"
As unsettling and cringe-inducing as the book can be (and the author does not shy away from showing in graphic detail what Celeste is doing to her victims), it's quite gripping, and - I admit this doesn't sound right - entertaining. As horrible as the main character is, the book is capably leavened by a considerable amount of very dark humor, ably assisted by the book's other unforgettable character, Janet Feinlog, a trainwreck of a fellow teacher that Celeste has as much disdain for as I had for the main character herself. It's weird to find myself recommending a novel that's full of graphic sexual abuse, but what can I say? This is a weird book, and unless you're completely disgusted from just reading about it, I'd suggest at least getting it out of your local library.
Grade: A
I have to give this book a lot of credit; it's the most gross, inappropriate, squicky, skin-crawling novel I've ever read, starting with the unpleasant furry black dust jacket.
The main character, Celeste (I almost absentmindedly typed "our heroine"; never has that been more inappropriate) is the book's strongest element, a genuinely scary psychopathic predator with a taste for young teenage boys who sums herself up in one sentence on page 41: ""Why did anyone pretend human relationships had value?"
As unsettling and cringe-inducing as the book can be (and the author does not shy away from showing in graphic detail what Celeste is doing to her victims), it's quite gripping, and - I admit this doesn't sound right - entertaining. As horrible as the main character is, the book is capably leavened by a considerable amount of very dark humor, ably assisted by the book's other unforgettable character, Janet Feinlog, a trainwreck of a fellow teacher that Celeste has as much disdain for as I had for the main character herself. It's weird to find myself recommending a novel that's full of graphic sexual abuse, but what can I say? This is a weird book, and unless you're completely disgusted from just reading about it, I'd suggest at least getting it out of your local library.
Grade: A
Saturday, August 10, 2013
"John Dies at the End"
John Dies at the End (David Wong)
I didn't know what to feel when reading this book, which is not a good sign. Honestly I'm not really sure what the book is going for; am I supposed to feel scared, amused, grossed-out, suspenseful, excited? The only one of those I really felt was grossed-out, which is not a terribly difficult feat. I guess that there's also supposed to be horror and humor in here, but none of this ever really landed. Mostly, I felt confused; why does throwing coffee on a demon made out of meat hurt it? Why does playing music from a boom box hurt it? (There's some guff in here about how a boom box is a modern "David's harp," and I guess I need to go back and brush up on my Bible, because I don't remember David fighting any demons, let alone destroying them with harp music.) The best books can draw a wondrous range of emotions from a reader, but this one just conjured up a slightly confused, annoyed yawn.
Grade: D-
I didn't know what to feel when reading this book, which is not a good sign. Honestly I'm not really sure what the book is going for; am I supposed to feel scared, amused, grossed-out, suspenseful, excited? The only one of those I really felt was grossed-out, which is not a terribly difficult feat. I guess that there's also supposed to be horror and humor in here, but none of this ever really landed. Mostly, I felt confused; why does throwing coffee on a demon made out of meat hurt it? Why does playing music from a boom box hurt it? (There's some guff in here about how a boom box is a modern "David's harp," and I guess I need to go back and brush up on my Bible, because I don't remember David fighting any demons, let alone destroying them with harp music.) The best books can draw a wondrous range of emotions from a reader, but this one just conjured up a slightly confused, annoyed yawn.
Grade: D-
Thursday, August 1, 2013
Rent Girl
If you ever want to see a sex worker or currently see sex workers, you are not going to want to read this book. While the author/main character never feels degraded by her job, she hates both her job and her clients. She is also kind of mean.
Sunday, July 7, 2013
"Promethea" (Book 3)
Promethea: Book 3 (Alan Moore, J.H. Williams III & Mick Gray)
It's been a while since books one and two (the perils of poaching books off your wife's shelf). Luckily I didn't feel too lost picking up here, although it took me a minute to remember what happened at the end of Book 2 - someone was killed, if that's the right word, and this book picks up with Promethea going after her. To do this she journies into the Sephirot (the Tree of Life, not the bad guy from Final Fantasy 7), which makes up basically all of this book.
And how is it? Pretty good. The writing's what you would expect from Alan Moore, and while apparently some reviewers didn't enjoy the mysticism, I'm not sure why you'd still be reading this series if that was a turn off. (I mean, this is a series where our heroine gets her powers by writing poems about imagination.) The art is also quite nice, although there are a few hiccups (one section done entirely in black and red that I think is supposted to be scary comes off more as eye-punching). I don't really have anything negative to say about this book; if you've already started reading the series, there's no reason not to get it, but I guess you don't really need me to tell you that.
Grade: A
It's been a while since books one and two (the perils of poaching books off your wife's shelf). Luckily I didn't feel too lost picking up here, although it took me a minute to remember what happened at the end of Book 2 - someone was killed, if that's the right word, and this book picks up with Promethea going after her. To do this she journies into the Sephirot (the Tree of Life, not the bad guy from Final Fantasy 7), which makes up basically all of this book.
And how is it? Pretty good. The writing's what you would expect from Alan Moore, and while apparently some reviewers didn't enjoy the mysticism, I'm not sure why you'd still be reading this series if that was a turn off. (I mean, this is a series where our heroine gets her powers by writing poems about imagination.) The art is also quite nice, although there are a few hiccups (one section done entirely in black and red that I think is supposted to be scary comes off more as eye-punching). I don't really have anything negative to say about this book; if you've already started reading the series, there's no reason not to get it, but I guess you don't really need me to tell you that.
Grade: A
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
"Titanicus"
Titanicus (Dan Abnett)
The last time I read a Dan Abnett book, I was, uh, not exactly enthralled, so I admit I was a little scared going into this one. Luckily, this book is much improved and very entertaining, albeit marred with some pacing issues. Actually, that may be a little too kind; this book is entertaining but bloated, weighing in at 600 pages, and containing three absolutely pointless story threads (a old crazy guy watering his garden, a toymaker who, um, makes toys and nothing interesting happens to, and a dockworker who happens to be the husband of another, slightly less pointless character). There's also one story thread that really has nothing to do with anything else in the book that could probably be dropped, all the more so as it's one of two threads about desperate PDF troopers behind enemy lines. (Also, the star of this story thread is the "slightly less pointless character" alluded to above - so if you cut this thread you might as well cut his as a bonus).
So the book's too big and has too many characters, half of whom nothing interesting happens to, but it's also the really only bad thing I have to say about the book, and I guess a novel titled Titanicus being too big at least makes some kind of sense. There are other little issues - the book wraps up way too quickly, which I chalk up as a symptom of having too many characters. Considering some of the terrible endings I've seen for W40k novels, this could be much worse, as it does at least wrap up the big plot threads competently Also, this is not a book for 40k beginners; I recommend reading Mechanicum first, or you'll be lost trying to keep straight if a Warlord or a Reaver class Titan is larger. (Spoiler: It goes Imperator, Warlord, Reaver, Warhound. I can tell you're impressed!)
To sum up, if you skip the needless storylines and you've got a great book; as it is, it's entertaining but flawed, which is still good enough to earn a solid
Grade: B
The last time I read a Dan Abnett book, I was, uh, not exactly enthralled, so I admit I was a little scared going into this one. Luckily, this book is much improved and very entertaining, albeit marred with some pacing issues. Actually, that may be a little too kind; this book is entertaining but bloated, weighing in at 600 pages, and containing three absolutely pointless story threads (a old crazy guy watering his garden, a toymaker who, um, makes toys and nothing interesting happens to, and a dockworker who happens to be the husband of another, slightly less pointless character). There's also one story thread that really has nothing to do with anything else in the book that could probably be dropped, all the more so as it's one of two threads about desperate PDF troopers behind enemy lines. (Also, the star of this story thread is the "slightly less pointless character" alluded to above - so if you cut this thread you might as well cut his as a bonus).
So the book's too big and has too many characters, half of whom nothing interesting happens to, but it's also the really only bad thing I have to say about the book, and I guess a novel titled Titanicus being too big at least makes some kind of sense. There are other little issues - the book wraps up way too quickly, which I chalk up as a symptom of having too many characters. Considering some of the terrible endings I've seen for W40k novels, this could be much worse, as it does at least wrap up the big plot threads competently Also, this is not a book for 40k beginners; I recommend reading Mechanicum first, or you'll be lost trying to keep straight if a Warlord or a Reaver class Titan is larger. (Spoiler: It goes Imperator, Warlord, Reaver, Warhound. I can tell you're impressed!)
To sum up, if you skip the needless storylines and you've got a great book; as it is, it's entertaining but flawed, which is still good enough to earn a solid
Grade: B
Monday, June 10, 2013
"Angel Exterminatus"
Angel Exterminatus (Graham McNeill)
I'm a little worried when starting a Graham McNeill book now; His books can be great (A Thousand Sons), mediocre and pointless (The Outcast Dead), or infuriatingly terrible (Priests of Mars). The knocks on McNeill are that he introduces too many groups of characters and that he doesn't know how to write an ending, and I admit that as I got closer and closer to the back cover of this book, I was becoming increasingly worried about how McNeill was going to wrap everything up.
Happily, McNeill pulls it off in style. There is one small cliffhanger at the ending, and one pointless group of side-characters (an insane doctor making twisted Space Marine mutants), but these are minor nitpicks in a quite enjoyable novel. The plot centers around Peturabo, from the Iron Warriors (and yes, there's a cute tie-in with the Iron Warriors Omnibus), who is taken along on a quest with Fulgrim, from the Emperor's Children. Fulgrim here is a very pleasant surprise, emerging as the book's most fleshed-out and entertaining character and also being rehabilitated from the terrible treatment he was given in the novel named after him. (All the more puzzling since McNeill himself also wrote that book!)
As well as Fulgrim is written, Peturabo is no slouch either, and it's quite enjoyable to watch the two bounce off each other in the novel's first half. The second half is quite a lot of action, ably assisted by the first half's stage setting, and as a whole the result is one of the better Horus Heresy novels, falling in the good-but-not-quite great tier, and quite easy to recommend to W40K fans. (Non-fans will be even more lost than usual, unfortunately.) I hope this is a return to form for McNeill, and if not, at least it's another bright spot in his body of work.
Grade: A-
I'm a little worried when starting a Graham McNeill book now; His books can be great (A Thousand Sons), mediocre and pointless (The Outcast Dead), or infuriatingly terrible (Priests of Mars). The knocks on McNeill are that he introduces too many groups of characters and that he doesn't know how to write an ending, and I admit that as I got closer and closer to the back cover of this book, I was becoming increasingly worried about how McNeill was going to wrap everything up.
Happily, McNeill pulls it off in style. There is one small cliffhanger at the ending, and one pointless group of side-characters (an insane doctor making twisted Space Marine mutants), but these are minor nitpicks in a quite enjoyable novel. The plot centers around Peturabo, from the Iron Warriors (and yes, there's a cute tie-in with the Iron Warriors Omnibus), who is taken along on a quest with Fulgrim, from the Emperor's Children. Fulgrim here is a very pleasant surprise, emerging as the book's most fleshed-out and entertaining character and also being rehabilitated from the terrible treatment he was given in the novel named after him. (All the more puzzling since McNeill himself also wrote that book!)
As well as Fulgrim is written, Peturabo is no slouch either, and it's quite enjoyable to watch the two bounce off each other in the novel's first half. The second half is quite a lot of action, ably assisted by the first half's stage setting, and as a whole the result is one of the better Horus Heresy novels, falling in the good-but-not-quite great tier, and quite easy to recommend to W40K fans. (Non-fans will be even more lost than usual, unfortunately.) I hope this is a return to form for McNeill, and if not, at least it's another bright spot in his body of work.
Grade: A-
Wednesday, May 15, 2013
"Void Stalker"
Void Stalker (Aaron Dembski-Bowden)
I often have trouble reviewing the third part in a trilogy I feel like I've already said everything I have to say in the reviews for books one and two. So what can I add here? This book is just like the other two novels, which is to say masterfully written, packed with expertly crafted characters and tense, explosive action scenes. In fact, this entire novel is tense; It opens with our hero foreseeing his own death, and I am still amazed at how the author manages to portray monstrous murderers who are running around literally eating babies as sympathetic enough that you're rooting for them by the end. At this point ADB needs to write a bad novel so I have something new to say about his books besides "they are great" and "you should read them".
Grade: A
I often have trouble reviewing the third part in a trilogy I feel like I've already said everything I have to say in the reviews for books one and two. So what can I add here? This book is just like the other two novels, which is to say masterfully written, packed with expertly crafted characters and tense, explosive action scenes. In fact, this entire novel is tense; It opens with our hero foreseeing his own death, and I am still amazed at how the author manages to portray monstrous murderers who are running around literally eating babies as sympathetic enough that you're rooting for them by the end. At this point ADB needs to write a bad novel so I have something new to say about his books besides "they are great" and "you should read them".
Grade: A
Sunday, May 5, 2013
"Blood Reaver"
Blood Reaver (Aaron Dembski-Bowden)
Part 2 of a trilogy kicked off by Soul Hunter. I'm going to pay this book an unusual compliment in that I enjoyed its aimlessness. Our heroes (I'm sure that's not the right word) are a hunted group of desperate murderers, and after being on the run for thousands of years, they're running low on beans and bullets (well, bolter rounds and kids to gene-hance into Space Marines, but you know what I mean). They put into port and spot a ship from their legion that's been stolen and re-painted, and the rest of the book is them scheming to get it back. There's no big evil villian - there are people who stand in opposition to the group of characters who get the most ink, but really, there's no good guys here. This feels nice and refreshing, and surprisingly realistic for a setting where nine foot tall supermen eunuchs in power armor hit giant bugs and space elves with chainsaw swords. As with the previous book, what started as a joke of a Space Marine Legion (the assassin who kills their Primarch is named after Martin Sheen, for chrissakes) is given a thorough rehabilitation and turned into a very nuanced set of characters (again, surprising for a setting where "He shoots guys" is a perfectly acceptable personality type). I'm trying not to just heap praise on this author and his books, but the sheer quality isn't making this task any easier.
Grade: A
Part 2 of a trilogy kicked off by Soul Hunter. I'm going to pay this book an unusual compliment in that I enjoyed its aimlessness. Our heroes (I'm sure that's not the right word) are a hunted group of desperate murderers, and after being on the run for thousands of years, they're running low on beans and bullets (well, bolter rounds and kids to gene-hance into Space Marines, but you know what I mean). They put into port and spot a ship from their legion that's been stolen and re-painted, and the rest of the book is them scheming to get it back. There's no big evil villian - there are people who stand in opposition to the group of characters who get the most ink, but really, there's no good guys here. This feels nice and refreshing, and surprisingly realistic for a setting where nine foot tall supermen eunuchs in power armor hit giant bugs and space elves with chainsaw swords. As with the previous book, what started as a joke of a Space Marine Legion (the assassin who kills their Primarch is named after Martin Sheen, for chrissakes) is given a thorough rehabilitation and turned into a very nuanced set of characters (again, surprising for a setting where "He shoots guys" is a perfectly acceptable personality type). I'm trying not to just heap praise on this author and his books, but the sheer quality isn't making this task any easier.
Grade: A
Tuesday, April 30, 2013
"The Infinite Wait"
The Infinite Wait and Other Stories (Julia Wertz)
When this blog started waaaaaay back in April 2011, Wertz's previous book Drinking at the Movies was the sixth review published. I only wish I'd started this blog before reading her first two books (the wonderfully named "Fart Party" volumes 1 and 2). Drinking at the Movies is a fairly straight narrative, and I think The Infinite Wait suffers slightly in comparison to it, both because some of the material is re-hashed, and because it's separated into three non-connected sections of Wertz's life. I enjoyed this book, but given its re-telling of some of the same parts of her life, I almost wonder if Wertz either needs to have more stuff happen to her before her next book, or start doing non-biographical work. In any case, I don't want to give the impression that this book is bad; it's merely got a few issues holding it back from greatness. It's also the best comic book I've read in 2013 (disclaimer: only comic book I have read in 2013).
Grade: B+
When this blog started waaaaaay back in April 2011, Wertz's previous book Drinking at the Movies was the sixth review published. I only wish I'd started this blog before reading her first two books (the wonderfully named "Fart Party" volumes 1 and 2). Drinking at the Movies is a fairly straight narrative, and I think The Infinite Wait suffers slightly in comparison to it, both because some of the material is re-hashed, and because it's separated into three non-connected sections of Wertz's life. I enjoyed this book, but given its re-telling of some of the same parts of her life, I almost wonder if Wertz either needs to have more stuff happen to her before her next book, or start doing non-biographical work. In any case, I don't want to give the impression that this book is bad; it's merely got a few issues holding it back from greatness. It's also the best comic book I've read in 2013 (disclaimer: only comic book I have read in 2013).
Grade: B+
Thursday, April 25, 2013
"Soul Hunter"
Soul Hunter (Aaron Dembski-Bowden)
There's a bunch of Space Marine legions that don't get much attention in W40K; The Ultramarines show up everywhere, but the likes of the Salamanders, Iron Warriors, and White Scars never get any ink. This book is about the Night Lords, one of these neglected groups, and it may be understandable why they've been ignored up until now - the concept behind them is Batman, if he went around murdering criminals to keep everybody in line. This is an interesting concept, but in the world of 40k where you can be an intolerant, murderous, paranoid bunch of religious fanatics and you're still as close as the setting comes to being the good guys, "killing criminals" isn't really that evil.
Luckily, they've been placed into the hands of an author who's already worked miracles with one chapter. The result isn't quite the masterpiece of The First Heretic, but it's quite good. The Night Lords are admirably fleshed out so that their underlying concept kind of makes sense. I only have two issues with this, and in fact these are my two issues with the book itself. One is that the Night Lord's leader, Konrad Curze, let himself be killed by an Imperial assassin; the book kind of lays some groundwork for why he let himself be killed, but never comes out and says his reason (or if it did, I didn't understand it). To be fair, there's an earlier novel about the Night Lords that probably covered this ground. The second issue is that the titular Soul Hunter of the novel's title has a long flashback towards the end of the book that explains his name and fleshes him out as a character, but coming where it does also drains a bit of the tension out of the climax.
Both of these are minor issues, though. The rest of the book is great, and the author is able to pull off one of the most difficult literary tricks out there - mixing humor and drama and pulling it off well. He's also able to repeat an effective technique from The First Heretic where you come to root for our anti-heroes even as they go around murdering innocent people and generally acting like, well, Chaos Space Marines.
So, to sum all that up: Book good; you should read.
Grade: A
There's a bunch of Space Marine legions that don't get much attention in W40K; The Ultramarines show up everywhere, but the likes of the Salamanders, Iron Warriors, and White Scars never get any ink. This book is about the Night Lords, one of these neglected groups, and it may be understandable why they've been ignored up until now - the concept behind them is Batman, if he went around murdering criminals to keep everybody in line. This is an interesting concept, but in the world of 40k where you can be an intolerant, murderous, paranoid bunch of religious fanatics and you're still as close as the setting comes to being the good guys, "killing criminals" isn't really that evil.
Luckily, they've been placed into the hands of an author who's already worked miracles with one chapter. The result isn't quite the masterpiece of The First Heretic, but it's quite good. The Night Lords are admirably fleshed out so that their underlying concept kind of makes sense. I only have two issues with this, and in fact these are my two issues with the book itself. One is that the Night Lord's leader, Konrad Curze, let himself be killed by an Imperial assassin; the book kind of lays some groundwork for why he let himself be killed, but never comes out and says his reason (or if it did, I didn't understand it). To be fair, there's an earlier novel about the Night Lords that probably covered this ground. The second issue is that the titular Soul Hunter of the novel's title has a long flashback towards the end of the book that explains his name and fleshes him out as a character, but coming where it does also drains a bit of the tension out of the climax.
Both of these are minor issues, though. The rest of the book is great, and the author is able to pull off one of the most difficult literary tricks out there - mixing humor and drama and pulling it off well. He's also able to repeat an effective technique from The First Heretic where you come to root for our anti-heroes even as they go around murdering innocent people and generally acting like, well, Chaos Space Marines.
So, to sum all that up: Book good; you should read.
Grade: A
Monday, April 15, 2013
"Bizarre Books"
Bizarre Books: A Compendium of Classic Oddities (Russel Ash & Brian Lake)
At first flipping through this book, I was disappointed that it was mostly titles; that feeling wore off as I realized that 98% of the books in here sound pretty terrible (Proceedings of the Second International Potato Modeling Confrence, anybody?). Most of the book's humor comes from either incredibly boring sounding books (1587, a Year of No Significance), titles that were perfectly normal at the time but are now suggestive (Scouts in Bondage), and the just plain fucked up (Planet of the Knob Heads, of which the authors quote: "In about a week I had recovered from most of the effects of the knob operation"). The last part of the book is both the most juvenile and my favorite, being a list of weird authors names (including W. Anker, Twat Booth and of course Ludwig von Baldass). There's really something here for everything is what I'm saying, and this is a great little bathroom book that's very difficult to put down.
Grade: A
At first flipping through this book, I was disappointed that it was mostly titles; that feeling wore off as I realized that 98% of the books in here sound pretty terrible (Proceedings of the Second International Potato Modeling Confrence, anybody?). Most of the book's humor comes from either incredibly boring sounding books (1587, a Year of No Significance), titles that were perfectly normal at the time but are now suggestive (Scouts in Bondage), and the just plain fucked up (Planet of the Knob Heads, of which the authors quote: "In about a week I had recovered from most of the effects of the knob operation"). The last part of the book is both the most juvenile and my favorite, being a list of weird authors names (including W. Anker, Twat Booth and of course Ludwig von Baldass). There's really something here for everything is what I'm saying, and this is a great little bathroom book that's very difficult to put down.
Grade: A
Friday, March 1, 2013
"I Am Better Than Your Kids"
I Am Better Than Your Kids (Maddox)
This is probably the meanest book I've ever read - it's a treasury of children's art getting mercilessly critiqued, and really, if you read that sentence and thought it sounds funny, you can just stop reading here and go out and buy it. For those of you recoiling in horror, let me just say that the book is so mean that it circles around to being hilarious, with my absolute favorite parts being the author highlighting drawings (for example, by making a hideous crayon drawing of a superhero into a mocked-up comic cover for "I will catch you in my web man"). I could not stop laughing while reading this book. Highly recommended.
Grade: A+
This is probably the meanest book I've ever read - it's a treasury of children's art getting mercilessly critiqued, and really, if you read that sentence and thought it sounds funny, you can just stop reading here and go out and buy it. For those of you recoiling in horror, let me just say that the book is so mean that it circles around to being hilarious, with my absolute favorite parts being the author highlighting drawings (for example, by making a hideous crayon drawing of a superhero into a mocked-up comic cover for "I will catch you in my web man"). I could not stop laughing while reading this book. Highly recommended.
Grade: A+
Monday, February 25, 2013
"The Word Bearers Omnibus"
The Word Bearers Omnibus (Anthony Reynolds)
This is three novels collected into one omnibus. I'm going to give each novel its own mini-bite-size book review - if you have an issue with this, take it up with Black Library; There's three full size novels in this omnibus, so you get three reviews here. More like small meal sized book review.blogspot.com!
Dark Apostle: I liked this book well enough, but I have two nits to pick, one big and one small. The small one is that the Word Bearers are about as evil as you get, and that's saying something in Warhammer 40k; I feel that the author goes a little overboard in trying to drive home that these guys are scum, to the point where they don't just light a candle, they light the BLOOD WICK on a BLOOD CANDLE, because, btw, they are evil. The larger issue is that these guys are chaos Space Marines, some of the baddest MFers out there, and when they invade an Imperial world and start fucking shit up, the loyalists send in..... the Imperial Guard? This is like sending in your local middle school's football team to play Green Bay. Even the chaos space marines comment on this, with one of them wondering what the hell the Imperium is thinking here. There's a little less tension than there could be because the Word Bearers never face credible opposition. These issues aren't huge, but the second one especially keeps the book at a good-not-great level, and it's perfectly skippable except that it sets up the next novel.
Grade: B
Dark Disciple: This is where it really picks up. There's a little bit of a refresher for those just joining us, and then it's straight into the ultraviolence. Most of the book is our heroes (is that the right term?) racing to unlock the macguffin from the previous book, backdropped against the Tyranids battling an Imperial fleet trying to stop them. Oh, and there's also a spoiler race hanging out up to no good (who ever is in Warhammer, though?). I really enjoyed this book - there's not a wasted page here, and once it gets going, I believe this may be the most violent novel I'e ever read. The amount of humans, space marines, tyranids, and race I can't name because it's a spoiler getting shot, stabbed, cut, blown up, burned, bludgeoned, and otherwise dispatched is truly impressive. I don't want to sound like a psycho and say I enjoyed it just because it's so violent, but it certainly is action-packed, and I'm not sure I can say more without sounding like a back of the book quote. (Although the back of the book quote is from somewhere called "Huntress Reviews" that yells right on its 1998 era front page that they ONLY GIVE OUT THREE TO FIVE STAR REVIEWS, so, Black Library, if you're one of the four people reading this blog, I'm sure I can come up with a better quote: Buy this omnibus or you're a dumb stupid moron!)
Grade: A
Dark Creed: Now with the activated mcguffin (spoiler alert), the Word Bearers plan is sprung. The first half of the book is setup and a big naval battle, which is nice and tense. In the second half, the Word Bearers finally (!) come up against loyalist Space Marines. I'm kind of amazed it took three novels for this, and unfortunately when it does come it's kind of an anticlimax. In fact, the second half as a whole is a bit weak, culminating in a not so fulfilling ending (there's one thing the Word Bearers do to save the day that had me wondering why they didn't just do it sooner). This is still a pretty good book - lots of 40k novels unfortunately have less than great endings, and judged against some of the ones I've read, this one is just a mild letdown - but I can't really say more without giving the whole plot away. Having come this far, it's nice to see everything get wrapped up. Dark Creed's not quite as good as the second book in the omnibus, but thanks to the cracking first half is better than the first.
Grade: B+
The omnibus closes out with a extra short story called "Torment" that wraps up the fate of one of the series main characters. It's not really nessessary reading, but it's a nice little bonus. Overall, this omnibus is pretty easy to recommend - $10 for three pretty good full-sized novels is nothing to sneeze at.
Overall grade: A-
Thursday, August 30, 2012
"Grandpa Won't Wake Up"
Grandpa Won't Wake Up (Simon Hill & Shannon Wheeler)
I don't really have a lot to say about this book except that I really enjoyed it. The bare-bones premise is that Grandpa told his grandkids he'd take them to the zoo, and he'd take them soon, and it's already noon, and Grandpa won't wake up. The writing is very funny, the art is very apt, and the attention to detail is wonderful (I lingered over the list at the back of fake horrible children's books). That's all I have to say.
Grade: A
I don't really have a lot to say about this book except that I really enjoyed it. The bare-bones premise is that Grandpa told his grandkids he'd take them to the zoo, and he'd take them soon, and it's already noon, and Grandpa won't wake up. The writing is very funny, the art is very apt, and the attention to detail is wonderful (I lingered over the list at the back of fake horrible children's books). That's all I have to say.
Grade: A
Sunday, August 5, 2012
"Swallowing The Earth"
Swallowing The Earth (Osamu Tezuka)
Apparently Tezuka is the "God of Manga", and here's a manga from him. And, uh, it's good. Like Promethea, I feel like I'm doing a disservice to explain too much of the plot, so the very broad outline is that the story kicks off with two soldiers looking for a mysterious woman named Zephirus who's up to no good, with our hero soon turning up in the shape of a drunk named Gohonmatsu Seki, who attempts to figure out what she's up to and maybe stop it in between getting drunk and unloading cargo down at the dock. There's a lot more to it than that; at heart the book is an adventure story, although individual chapters can be at turns comedic, heartbreaking or - as the book goes on and synthetic skin shows up - skin-crawlingly creepy. The art's very nice, dating from back before manga became very stylized, with a more cartoony flavor to it. The only caveat I'd apply here is that there's a lot of nudity and violence - the book suggests readers over 16 - and that, having come out in Japan in 1968, there's some, um, dated depictions of South Seas islanders and American black people in the book. If you can look past this (or just read disclaimer about this issue, which is among the first things you see when opening the book), you shouldn't pass this up.
Grade: A
Apparently Tezuka is the "God of Manga", and here's a manga from him. And, uh, it's good. Like Promethea, I feel like I'm doing a disservice to explain too much of the plot, so the very broad outline is that the story kicks off with two soldiers looking for a mysterious woman named Zephirus who's up to no good, with our hero soon turning up in the shape of a drunk named Gohonmatsu Seki, who attempts to figure out what she's up to and maybe stop it in between getting drunk and unloading cargo down at the dock. There's a lot more to it than that; at heart the book is an adventure story, although individual chapters can be at turns comedic, heartbreaking or - as the book goes on and synthetic skin shows up - skin-crawlingly creepy. The art's very nice, dating from back before manga became very stylized, with a more cartoony flavor to it. The only caveat I'd apply here is that there's a lot of nudity and violence - the book suggests readers over 16 - and that, having come out in Japan in 1968, there's some, um, dated depictions of South Seas islanders and American black people in the book. If you can look past this (or just read disclaimer about this issue, which is among the first things you see when opening the book), you shouldn't pass this up.
Grade: A
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
"Promethea" (Book 2)
Promethea: Book Two (Alan Moore)
Pretty much more of the same - which is a good thing in this case. With the basics taken care of, this is where Promethea starts getting really weird; The back half of this book is, in order, a issue-long exploration of how a living concept like Prometha has sex, a story about Y2K causing people's clothes and furniture which is made out of electronic goo turning sentient and attacking, and Prometha being shown the history of the universe and the human race, themed to the major arcana of the tarot cards, by the talking snakes of her caduceus, who always speak in rhymes. In other words, don't miss it.
Grade: A
Pretty much more of the same - which is a good thing in this case. With the basics taken care of, this is where Promethea starts getting really weird; The back half of this book is, in order, a issue-long exploration of how a living concept like Prometha has sex, a story about Y2K causing people's clothes and furniture which is made out of electronic goo turning sentient and attacking, and Prometha being shown the history of the universe and the human race, themed to the major arcana of the tarot cards, by the talking snakes of her caduceus, who always speak in rhymes. In other words, don't miss it.
Grade: A
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
"The Outcast Dead" (Horus Heresy series)
The Outcast Dead (Graham McNeil)
This was a disappointing book. The premise is gangbusters: An astropath - the psychics who can touch minds and are the only way of communicating faster than light over long distances - recieves a vision about the end of the Heresy, and a dirty dozen of space marines who were trapped on Earth when their legions went traitor have to bust him out of a Legio Custodes prison.
In execution, though, McNeil wastes a lot of time with two ancilliary plotlines that - spoiler alert - have fuck-all to do with the book's main plot. The result is that the book never really goes anywhere; Some shit happens, then it's over. It's a shame, too, because the early parts of the book exploring how the astropaths use shared psychic imagery when communicating (they can't send words, so they send visions) is really fascinating. The rest of the book, not so much. For Horus Heresy completionists only.
Grade: C
This was a disappointing book. The premise is gangbusters: An astropath - the psychics who can touch minds and are the only way of communicating faster than light over long distances - recieves a vision about the end of the Heresy, and a dirty dozen of space marines who were trapped on Earth when their legions went traitor have to bust him out of a Legio Custodes prison.
In execution, though, McNeil wastes a lot of time with two ancilliary plotlines that - spoiler alert - have fuck-all to do with the book's main plot. The result is that the book never really goes anywhere; Some shit happens, then it's over. It's a shame, too, because the early parts of the book exploring how the astropaths use shared psychic imagery when communicating (they can't send words, so they send visions) is really fascinating. The rest of the book, not so much. For Horus Heresy completionists only.
Grade: C
Thursday, February 23, 2012
"Holy Sh*t!"
Holy Sh*t! The World's Weirdest Comic Books (Paul Gravett & Peter Stanbury)
Well, it's pretty much all there in the title - here's a interesting little book collecting some of the world's oddest comic books, running the gamut from Italian porno spider-woman knockoffs to the Archie-styled Hansi ("The girl who loved the swastika"). Each comic includes a full-page cover, a sample frame and a short discription. My only real complaint is that I'd like to see more of some of these; If you want to see more "Trucker Fags in Denial" or "Godzilla vs Barkley", who knows how easy those are to track down. (Also, it would be nice if the book was a little bigger, but then it wouldn't exactly be a bathroom book.) My personal favorite is Genus, specifically the "Special Extra Large Lesbian Unicorn Issue" featured here (the author dryly notes that the extra large "refers to the size of the issue, not the lesbian unicorns").
Grade: B
Well, it's pretty much all there in the title - here's a interesting little book collecting some of the world's oddest comic books, running the gamut from Italian porno spider-woman knockoffs to the Archie-styled Hansi ("The girl who loved the swastika"). Each comic includes a full-page cover, a sample frame and a short discription. My only real complaint is that I'd like to see more of some of these; If you want to see more "Trucker Fags in Denial" or "Godzilla vs Barkley", who knows how easy those are to track down. (Also, it would be nice if the book was a little bigger, but then it wouldn't exactly be a bathroom book.) My personal favorite is Genus, specifically the "Special Extra Large Lesbian Unicorn Issue" featured here (the author dryly notes that the extra large "refers to the size of the issue, not the lesbian unicorns").
Grade: B
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